The Long Grey Night of the Soul


Wherein our narrator 'fesses up. Finally.

There have not, for several months, been many entries in this blog. Really, only one, a humorous little ditty that I wrote basically to keep myself focused and out of an all-too-real panic attack due to an unforeseen caffeine overdose.

Why, you may well ask.

And so you might.

And this entry I've tossed over time and time again, but I've never written it. Never knew if I wanted to write it.

Only it started coming out of me. In the oddest ways.

I dreamt of writing a novel, "Half the World," thinly disguised autobiography, about a man who travels across half the world to flee himself, his actions, his broken heart.

And toyed with the idea. And sent myself a little note the other day, a bit to close to the core of the matter:

Subject: Theorem

You can reinvent yourself only up to the limit of what you’re willing to leave behind.

***

And so it goes. Because it's sitting right out there on the surface, right there, right out in the open.

I am unhappy.

And I am not unhappy because of where I am in the world. Sydney is wonderful - though it is mid-Winter, and that's less enjoyable than I might have it, it doesn't really suck at all - and my work is interesting, if somewhat draining.

But it isn't enough. And it isn't going to ever be enough. Because now I've thought about it enough, and I know it's not enough. It's not the moment of resignation. It's the moment of revelation.

I'm heartbroken because I'm still in love. And I haven't stopped being in love, not for a moment. Not ever.

On the 4th of July last year, on a rooftop in Santa Monica, after an afternoon of drinking and a little light pot smoking, one of my friends, perceptive in that witchy-sort-of-hit-the-nail-on-the-head-by-accident sort of way, said, "I bet you go crazy and break their hearts." Or words to that effect.

And it's true. And I couldn't answer her then, because i couldn't answer myself.

How can you look back on the one moment in your life which fucked everything up, and see it, and see yourself doing it, over and over again, and only understand that it was stupidity and rage and brokenness which brought you to it?

I may be a romantic, but I'm not a sentimental sort, nor am I terrifically nostalgic. Things happen, and I move on.

But somehow, I'm not able to move beyond this. The wound is still there. And it's still as fresh as the day it happened. And it's time I owned up to it.

Because whatever I was looking for here - most likely, a replacement, something to staunch the bleeding from the wound - is the one thing I'll never find.

Because I don't want to find it.

I don't want to turn the clock back. Well, not much. I don't want the past to be undone. Well, not much.

What I want is the only man I've ever really loved. I want him back. Desperately. Even if he is 13,000 km away. Because distance doesn't matter.

And I have felt this wound, from time to time, when thinking about what I am doing here, and why I am here, and how long I'll be here, and whatever made me come here. Certainty, mostly. I needed space, and money, and time to think.

Well, I've had plenty of each of those. More than enough, really.

And today the other shoe drops, as my mail client choked on a 4 MB enclosure:


Hi Mark-

I hope Australia is treating you well. How is the new program, have you got
things whipped into shape. I love getting the Yeschaton emails, which at
least paints the picture that you are doing well.

Me? I've been great. I love the time that school is allowing me, and
evidently the time to make work is paying off. I had my first piece in a
museum over the summer (a sound piece in the Musee d'art Modern de la ville
de Paris) and I'll be putting another up in LACMA in November. So that is
all going really well. Now I'm beginning to think about getting a real job
and start experimenting with prefab architecture so I can really afford a
home in LA...but that's a different story....

Right now I'm working on an experimental radio station project. The
schematic for the idea is attached, as well as the preliminary press release
from the space. Check it out.

I've been trying to organize a series of science features of scientists and
artists presenting their work- and I kept thinking of you- and specifically
becoming transhuman. Would you be interested in producing a radio show? It
would be new or old, massive of small. Let me know what you think.

Xoxo
Jeff

***

And god that pain is so fresh. It makes me double over inside. I want to call him and ask him how he's doing, all the time subtly fishing around, wondering if he's got a boyfriend. I want to know that he's free again, so I can get on my knees and beg and plead and sweep him off his feet again. I want to know that there is still a place, somewhere, in his heart, for me. His heart, which I broke so perfectly, so precisely, so completely, only because I wanted to break my own.

There is no getting around this. This is this. The point of it all, the reason for being. And I know that now because I've removed all of the other factors, of place, of stress, of time, reduced myself to the basics of who and what I am. And this remains.

This remains.

Posted: Wed - August 4, 2004 at 08:34 PM        


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