THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF PARTY PHONE MESSAGES:

  1. Thou shalt include the ticket price information.
  2. Thou shalt refrain from rambling about thy philosophical beliefs.
  3. Thou shalt be punctual. Tary not after the promised hour.
  4. Thou shalt keep the music at the beginning to a minimum.
  5. Thou shalt play music representative of the music played at the gathering.
  6. Thou shalt keep the background music low enough for callers to hear thy message.
  7. Thou shalt summarize the location before going into long-winded directions.
  8. Thou shalt not insult the caller or overstate the lineup, lest bad karma accumulate against thee.
  9. Thou shalt not record the message if thou hast an heavy accent; be not full of pride, but let thy non-accented brother or sister record the message.
  10. Thou shalt not speak of PLUR on the phone message, only to hold a party that looketh like no more than a beer bust, lest thy fellow ravers strike thee for blasphemy.